Not wanting to say your name or share it

knowing you are my very own Felipe

I’ll say only that and whisper your name in my heart

and casually in conversation as if you were an eternal part of life

and still are

you are what I know now a man is

not everything to me

oh I know you call it timing -and maybe so it was

for both of us

and we both ware running fast, wanting to escape and destroy our pasts

my past that keeps coming back, again and again

and yours that tried to kill you

but strong you are

i could sit and watch you for hours

under the shiny starts

you always let me choose

watching you care for both of us

embracing you embracing me

I feel so sad sometimes

but mostly I don’t cry because it’s voer

I smile because it happened

you, to me,

me, ever so amazed

you knew what to do and say

you know how to hold me

pulling me in, lifting me up, spinning me around

I had never been so thrilled

but mostly I loved flowing back into you

I loved knowing you were happy with me by your side

still,

still,

still,

it’s a story with no ending

now I have a mold to work with

things to fill and things to leave behind

places left untouched

and crevices opened up

ready to gush out, like they did in your arms

gushing affection to and from

in magical exchanges

where much was said with so few words

My very own Felipe.